Archive for January, 2011

January 30th, 2011.

In the name of Allah.

I know, you know , we all know, that once it’s there, it can never go away. Nak buat macamana, it’s just how things go between you and me.

What am I going to do, when the best part of me is you?

hate? no laah

In the name of Allah.

It’s not that I hate you, I just don’t REALLY like you. It’s very different from hate because being unlikeable (?) by me, means, I know the harm that you would cause me, if I were to be friends with you.

Faham tak?

Probably not.

This does not necessarily mean that you’re a bad person. Maybe not a suitable person for me to be friends with. Maybe our different viewpoints made me realise that people can actually choose who they want to be with.

You’ve made your choice. Now please let me make mine.

January 15th, 2011

In the name of Allah.

Praise Lord, yesterday was one of those eye-opening days I’ve had in my 21 years of living. I went on a lunch date yesterday with two friends, one of which was a senior in school.

She has always been someone, I’ve thought of when it comes to relationships. I don’t know why, but she simply is. And, indeed she is one of the most experienced in it, I must say.

We were talking and listening, well I did most of the listening, because I was such in a misery these past few weeks. and of course what she said was indefinitely true, like the ones you read in books. But the fact that it is said by a person to another person, I was in such awe. I mean, we’ve read dozens of books and articles but hearing it all over again, make a whole lot different. Somehow, I feel like someone has just hold me by the hand and support me at the back. It was such a good feeling.

Alhamdulillah, the talk we had was worth the time.  I felt like I just met an experienced shrink from the Life&everythingyouneedtoknowaboutit clinic.

One thing that has definitely wake me up was the fact that I have never really given myself space to grow up. Not in terms of being a baby or taking care of myself, which I have done pretty well, no doubt. It’s the idea of giving myself space and time to work my relationship with people. For instance, meeting new people and getting to know them better, instead of sticking to the same old circle of people. I came to understand yesterday, I have been missing a lot of good opportunities in letting people surprise me. I feel so bad saying this, but I have to admit that I am judgemental towards the new persons in my life. Up till yesterday, at least. They have to be this, and that, and whatevercrap I want them to be, which is soooo SALAH.

How I was so wrong. and guilty to everyone around me.

Alhamdulillah, I praise Allah, for through His grace, I am able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I might just find the answer to the question that has been playing in my mind in the past couple of years.

Surprise me, whoever you are. 🙂

frustration

In the name of Allah.

Have you ever had this feeling of frustration and all you wish for is to be able to run away to the furtherest place one could reach you?

distant by George Harrison @deviantART

It’s obviously none of my business, but somehow, I cannot stop myself from getting myself in trouble. Which at the end of the day, will cause me even greater pain.

Sedar-sedar lah kawan. People don’t always turn out to be the way we want them to.

30 days photo challenge

While watching tv today,

Forgive and forget,’ that’s what they say. It’s good advice, but it’s not very practical. When someone hurts us, we want to hurt them back; when someone wrongs us, we want to be right. Without forgiveness, old scores are never settled, old wounds never heal, and the most we can hope for is one day we’ll be lucky enough to forget.

random 2011

at deviantart by soo~me