Posts Tagged ‘ puzzle ’

putar belit hati.

In the name of Allah, the most merciful.

I have to say this, and this has been one of the universal truth about me.

I am neither strong, nor I am used to have my hopes and dreams being crushed. Not to say that I always get things going my way or the spoil brat who gets everything. I’ve gone through a lot, for a 21 year old girl, but I am not strong. I have breakdowns and this, right here, is one of them.

Lately, everything seemed to have gone wrong. Not that I am frustrated with what has happened, but I think, it might have been too much for me to bear. One after the other. Bagai jatuh ditimpa tangga.

One thing that keeps me going was something kak Diha told me last autumn break.

Kita kan Muslim, kenalah kuat.

Alhamdulillah, with Him in my heart, I somehow know that everything’s going to turn out fine and insyAllah, better than neither of us expected. I mean, everything happens for a reason, right? He wouldn’t have let us go through such a bumpy ride, if it is not for a great experience, I believe.

Given my best in looking for a new place to say next year, I think it is time to leave everything and tawakal. Istiharah.

If we’re not meant to stay there, perhaps, there should be some signs or maybe I will not have this uneasiness anymore. Either way, Allah knows best, and anything that He says best for us, will sure be the only best thing for us. Perhaps, if we are to find another flat, Allah wants us to work harder, to find a better place than the one we already have no. Again, Allah knows best.

Ya Allah, tetapkanlah hati-hati kami yang berbolak-balik ini. Berikanlah petunjuk yang terbaik agar kami berada dalam ketenangan. Amin~

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Who’s to blame?

In the name of Allah, the most merciful. There is no God except Allah, and Muhammad is His messenger.

Sometimes we thought ourselves as to being who our parents shape us.Maksudnya, it’s something like the following:

Nak buat macamana, dah parents aku pun macam tu.

Aku dah di besarkan oleh mak pak aku, takkan aku nak jadi macam anak mak pak hang!

No doubt that parents, or probably our family influence our behvaiour the most. Like for myself, I am loud. due to the fact that I am brought up in such a family.

But, I think, that should not be the reason for one stick in mind when they are behaving inappropriately. I mean, for example when one commits crime, perhaps the parents’ upbringing should be blamed but I think that is not the main reason for one to act in such a way.

We do have moral conscience, right? 

So, where is it?

Then again, it rises the question of whether to behave morally is a learned behaviour or whether we simply know what’s right and what’s not.

Because, if it is a learned behaviour, than our generation is in so much trouble as to the belief that to behave moraaly right is because everyone’s doing it and not because, the real reasons of it being a good thing. Of it being the right thing to do.

Jiwa kosong? Astaghfirullah.

In the name of Allah, the most merciful. There is no God except Allah, and Muhammad is His messenger.

Lately, I’ve been having this empty feeling inside of me. Probably due to the extreme freedom that I have now in comparison to the super business I had just before the holiday started.

Now that I am soo free, I wish that I have some other things to do to fill this free time. So, the plan is to look at next semester’s assignments and try to do figure out/ do some part of it. Adibah and I went to submit our NW job form just now. Hopefully we’ll get the jobs. Allah humma yassir wala tuassir. InsyAllah.

Today I attended the thulatha’ kuliah. Alhamdulliah, terisi jiwa dengan kisah sirah zaman terdahulu. Thank you for having it during this winter break. At least, jiwa tak terbiar kosong. Jzzk.

Then again, I think it is better to be awfully busy than have all the time in the world. See, when we do have time for ourselves, (this is what happen to me, probably not you people), we tend to channel it to doing unuseful, non-profitable actions and behaviours (E.g.: movies, games). In contrast, if we’re busy, time would be very well-spent and when doing something, we would make sure that it is done properly and that the product would be at its best. One of the thing that I’ve noticed in myself is that, when reciting Quran. Because it is the only time I have for myself during the busy period, having to read the Quran really soothed me after heavy reading or writing a lengthy essay. This is one thing I do not feel when I am soooo overly free. How I wish I have more stuff to do rather than just lazing in the flat.

Come to think of it, it’s like we’ve been actually fooled by what people said to be the best thing. Ye la. No doubt being caged with assignments is an awful feeling, but we never thought of the the good things that the bussiness has brought us, has given us. That my friend, is our fault. Not having to think for ourselves and following what seemed to be the ‘artificial happiness, man-constructed satisfaction’. Astaghfirullah.

Ya Allah, let me not stray afar. Fill me with your wisdom to become one of those who will be in Your Garden and not near the jahannam.

who are you?

when life seemed overwhelming

and you see yourself, lack in everything,

just run.

run away from the disturbing thoughts,

into the arms of comfort.

pathethic’s THE word.

none can object on that.

think again.

bukan budak kecik weyh!

maturity that stands with you

when you tok those decisions.

kau bukan budak kecil.

no one can kick you and simply run away with it.

this time, you’ll show who you are

and what you are made up of.

bukan tanah liat.

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